We are approaching the one day each year set aside to honor motherhood. Having been a mother since the age of 19, my ideas of what motherhood means to me has shifted and changed over the last 39 years. At first, I witnessed motherhood as this fiercely protective defender of the rights of my child. The standing joke was I owned them until they were 18. It was the same message our mom gave us. Now, I see my role as a mother to be something more akin to a singing bowl, or a the drum casing. As my children live their lives, I am learning (and it has not been an easy lesson) to receive them into this space. If my echo from my own life experiences help them, then it is a gift for both of us. If the song I sing somehow has no landing-place I still sing it. But now I sing it with less expectations and truly more love and compassion.

As mothers we are taught to nurture and keep the family core together, even if it means doing so without a partner. Sometimes our sacrifices are viewed as selfish; other times as necessary by those we love. In my role, and by the example from my childhood, what I learned to do was keep my voice silent. Fear drove my actions and created misunderstandings that took time and patience to heal. What I can say, with all honesty, is that motherhood has been my greatest privilege and honor. It has not been a perfect performance, but I have done what I have done with deep and abiding love. As I have learned to let go, the voice of the Divine Mother gives me daily permission to speak what my heart tells me to be true. It still often comes from deep passion and fire, but at least I now can sing. Hopefully the fire is less hot and more warming to the souls I ushered into adulthood.

All cultures have a Divine Mother who represents the heart of all spiritual matters. To be a mother is a very Divine act, deeply spiritual. To drown out the voice of Divine Mother is to create a barrier between the very love we feel for our children and our own heart and intentions. It takes courage to be self-reflective, willing to ask for forgiveness, and facing the humbling fact we are not perfect. But, it also takes courage to ask for what we want of our children, to demand greatness from them and to help them see that all relationships (even the ones with our babies) eventually become adult relationships that involve both of us. I am blessed to have the most wonderful children any woman could hope for; I feel the same for the partners they share their life with. I appreciate their patience with me as I have unraveled what it means to me to be their mom. The voice of Divine Mother guides me, inspires me, and holds my hand when I am inclined down a road that does not serve my intention or my heart. Regardless of your faith, seek out the Divine Mother who can move your heart and actions. It will be your greatest Mother’s Day gift of all time.

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